Yes, I am unlucky when it comes to noise, even in the UK. Retiring to bed at 10pm last night prior to getting up at 3.30 for my flight, I was kept awake by the people above my parents’ flat who’d decided to do a bit of late-night furniture moving. On wooden floors. Maybe they’re of Spanish descent. For Spanish readers, I should point out 10pm is considered late night in the UK and not early evening. In Portugal, of course, it’s the middle of the night.

Within a few minutes of me writing that I’d seen no rain in the UK in 12 days, the heavens opened. Whereas the sun was shining brightly when I landed back in Santiago. It doesn't do to provoke the weather gods.

One of the great displeasures of my UK trip was reading my parents’ Daily Mail every day. Well, I say ‘reading’ but ‘scanning’ would be more accurate. This is one of the dreadful British tabloid newspapers but by no means the worst of the bunch. As with all its brethren, it prospers greatly on the back of sensationalism. But the Daily Mail’s version of this is to seek not just to frighten but to terrify its numerous readers on a daily basis. I meant to list a few examples of its headlines but never got round to it. Suffice now to say that, I’d been told just before I left Spain that the Daily Mail was forecasting 3 huge storms during my time in the UK, one of which would coincide with my return flight. In the event there was hardly a breeze during the entire period. OK, one more. How did the paper report the massive sales of iPods over Christmas? – “Ipod is gadget most likely to be stolen, say insurers”. You get the picture. Needless to say, my ageing mother lives in a state of perpetual terror. For those still interested in this paragraph, here’s a bit more about this report, plus another of the same genre:- “It was one of the most sought-after gifts this Christmas. But if you were lucky enough to be one of the estimated 15 million tearing wrapping paper off a prized iPod, be warned. The electrical gadget is more likely to be stolen or destroyed than any other piece of equipment in your home. Insurance experts said they received more claims for iPods than any other item, including mobile phones, digital cameras and laptops.”
“Thousands of computers given as Christmas presents are creating a computer virus time-bomb, experts have warned. They say the new PCs could contract a virus within minutes of being connected to the internet”.

Within a minute of getting into my car in Santiago, I had to illegally cross a solid white line because someone had double-parked on a main road. And in the café I stopped at for a coffee I couldn’t hear myself think for the TV in the corner showing one of the daytime shows featuring big-breasted blonde bimbos bawling at each other. But it’s great to be home.