I see Paris Hilton’s left prison and is to get 1 million dollars for prattling inanely to some star interviewer. What a missed opportunity. Surely enough of us could have got together to raise more than this to pay some star altruist to machine gun her as she emerged. Along with all the TV crews waiting for her. Is it any wonder the majority of the young British girls recently asked by their teacher what they wanted to be when they grew up simply wrote ‘Famous’?

The Spanish may not boast high productivity but they certainly work the longest hours in Europe. Or I thought they did. Then I read Andrew Greeley’s comment that “If number of hours worked is a sign of the Protestant ethic, then Irish Catholics are the last Protestants in Europe”. I wonder what their productivity is like.

How depressing that binge-drinking Anglos are turning the centre of Rome into a nightmare. Or evening-to-nightmare more probably. But there are public drinking problems here in Spain too. Near my daughter’s flat in Madrid, every Thursday, Friday and Saturday night brings more police onto the street than you’d see in a lifetime in the UK. This is usually to prevent the ‘emblematic’ Dos de Mayo square being taken over by the night-long raucous revellers but, more recently, the aim has been to prevent a repeat of the destructive rioting there of early May. There’s always a bit of this on the anniversary of an 1808 uprising against the French occupiers but this year’s was quite serious and there are already fears about what will happen on the 200^th anniversary next year. Ironically, the riots were in protest against attempts to clamp down on the growing phenomenon of street drinking. Or el botellón as it’s known here. The rioters were also said to be annoyed at the city’s plans to turn the rather Bohemian Malasaña barrio into something more commercial. Whatever that means.

Talking of the French . . . If M. Sarkozy really came to power to restore Gallic self-confidence and pride, then he’s certainly off to a flying start. First he waters down the EU’s frightening-to-the-French commitment to free competition; then he helps Mrs Merkel bulldoze through the same treaty/constitution which his own voters rejected two years ago; and finally he kiboshes Turkey’s negotiations for entry into the EU, dismissing it as an Asian nation which should only aspire to join the junior club of the Mediterranean Union. As you may recall, Mr Sarkozy set this up a month or so ago, with the willing help of Mr Zapatero. I think I voiced suspicions at the time about its true raison d’être. This now appears to be to offer a cul-de-sac for Turkey. Or holding pen, more accurately.

Looking ahead for new challenges for Monsieur Sarkozy, I have this vision in which Spain has finally broken up into its constituent parts, with each of its 17 ‘nations’ becoming a state of a 44 member EU. Or 45, if Scotland has gone independent by then. But the Basque Country – after a referendum – is demanding it be enlarged to include not only the neighbouring state of Navarra but also bits of southern France. I guess Mr S’s response will be to propose a Pyrenean Union. But I don’t rule out invasion. Especially if he’s changed his name to Napoleon by then. Actually, a cross-border anschluss would have a certain poetic appeal – the French and the Basques having to live with each other. It would certainly be fun to watch. And the French could always maximise our enjoyment by marching east and taking over the we-are-finally-not-Spain state of Catalunia. You heard it here first!

To get back to reality . . . Astonishingly, in 1944 Friedrich Hayek predicted that, as the state expanded its responsibilities, it would become sclerotic and exceed its capacity to respond to people’s demands and aspirations. As a result, they would become disillusioned with democracy and calls would be made for decisions to be “taken out of politics” and placed in the hands of experts. So, if the EU hadn’t invented itself around the same time as Hayek was saying this, we’d now being demanding it ourselves. It’s nice we were saved the bother.