Thursday, August 29, 2013

Cockles & Mussels; Just muscles; Gib x 2; Bullfighting; and a Spanish insult.

You may have heard the expression 'cockles and mussels' and you may even have sung the chorus line about them from 'Molly Malone'. But have you ever seen them side by side? Well, I hadn't either until the other night, when someone at the next table to us was partaking of them:-

I swear this is one of those coincidences which must come from God . . . Here are 2 pix of muscles from ads down the side of my Facebook page:-

My question is - Can there really be anyone in the world who wants to have arms like this?

HT to Lenox for this amusing article on the benefits Gibraltar would garner from becoming Spanish. I was pleased to see the writer making the point I've stressed several times - and which the Spanish government seems incapable of grasping - viz. that the British government would love to get shut of the place. But needs Spanish help and cooperation on this. So what does the Spanish Minister of Foreign Affairs do? He ratchets up the nonsense that makes it ever more necessary for the British government (and the tabloid media) to defend the locals. By which I don't mean the apes. The Forlorn and Failed Franco Strategy we might call it. As it happens, I was chatting to someone last night who knows said minister (Margallo) from the time she worked in the higher reaches of the Ministry of Health. A very calm lady, she described him as cocky(chulo), coarse(burdo), proud, imprudent and 'violent'. Can't say I was much surprised, having watched his ridiculous big-mouthed performances over the summer. He not only looks like a clown but acts like one. Spanish politics at it most desperate. And mis-guided.

Taking of Spanish customs . . . Bullfighting, in truth, is only of interest to a minority of Spaniards and the number of aficionados has been falling for years. As you'd expect, the majority - though by no means all - of its supporters are right-of-centre. So it was inevitable the PP party would try to reverse the efforts of the previous socialist government to accelerate the trend of falling revenues and subsidies. And, in particular, to try to reverse the bans on bullfighting brought in by the governments of Cataluña and the Canary Islands. This will be done by making the activity ("Not a sport!") an 'asset of Spanish cultural interest'. As someone for the bull-breeders union put it:- “It is an artistic and cultural manifestation of our society and it seems absolutely natural bullfighting should be declared a symbol of cultural heritage.” Parliament will vote on the issue next month but, meanwhile, after an absence of 7 years, bullfighting returns to our early-evening TV next Sunday. Timed so that the kids can watch it and absorb some culture.

Spaniards, it can be fairly said, love to argue, but not always sanely. The story about the odd Gibraltar montage put on his Facebook page by a Spanish mayor naturally made the British newspapers yesterday. I decided to point out that:-
1. The troops are marching out of Gibraltar, not into the place.
2. The planes are about to crash into the Rock.

3. The flag has no pole.
4. The bull was the trade mark of Osborne, originally a British company.
5. It has a tail but no cojones.


It didn't take long to get a response. Unfortunately, it was in the ad hominem, abusive tone that often passes for argument in Spain:- I do understand why you are unable to see the bull balls, and this is because you have never seen any in your whole life. This could happened for mainly two reasons:
1st.- Because you have no balls and your father didn't neither 
or 2nd, because you have such a enormous belly that it impedes you to see your own kleine[small] balls.

Finally . . . You might like to know that the polite form of saying hijo de puta (son of a whore) is hijo de la gran bretaña. Something to do with Francis Drake and his ilk, I imagine. Either way, it warms the cockles . . . .


Lenox said...

I was thinking today... what if Gibraltar was Spanish, and on the other side of the entrance to the Mediterranean, Ceuta (part of España before Morocco was invented: yawn!). Between them, all of the Med traffic would pass...
Can't see it myself.

Colin said...

Yep, I guess Madrid would impose a 'congestion charge'.

Anonymous said...

Colin, TH to Guardian Witness for this view of the iceberg tip.


Please lets learn from this and ban offshore havens.

I live in Spain. My next door neighbour and many close to me are Gibraltarians or Non Spanish. They all live permanently in Spain yet they have Gibraltar registered cars, this is illegal because they should be residents if they live here and thus pay their taxes.

My neighbour buys at the same shop as me, eats in the house next to me, yet takes his invoices to the Spanish customs and gets a refund of the vat because in theory the goods in the invoice are going to Gibraltar, when in reality, they are a few metres away from me.

One of those that live close to me with a Gibraltar registered car works in a Financial company in Gibraltar, advising people that they if they want to invest in Spain, or other EU countries, they should create an offshore Gibraltar company, thus as business takes place outside Gibraltar, no duties are paid in Gibraltar (nor Spain or rest of EU).

His property is also in the name of one of these offshore companies. If I sell my house both I and the buyer have to pay VAT. If he sells his house, he changes the name of the owner of the Gibraltar offshore company and the Spanish government has no knowledge that owner has changed.

I hope these recent events in Gibraltar result in International Tribunals deciding once and for all who the waters belong to, to whom the land where airport strip has been built belongs to, but most importantly, I sincerely hope that the tax evasion that takes places in tax havens such as Gibraltar, Channel Islands, Cayman Islands and so on, are prohibited from operating within the EU and long term they disappear completely.

10 days ago near Los Barrios

Colin said...

Hear, hear.

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