Here's a statistic which will cause a few problems for those of the We-are-about-to-perish-from-global-warming school - temperatures stoped rising in 1998, even though emissions have powered ahead over the last 8 years. But doubtless they will have an explanation, even if its scientific basis is iffy.

Liverpool humour - and it comedians - are justly famous. Here's a little story which is a paradigm of Scouse humour. It will, I suspect, leave only a few of you with heaving sides and the rest totally nonplussed . . .

When the American singer Gene Pitney died last week during a UK tour, an undertaker was summoned and asked to make him a coffin as quickly as possible. His reply was that this would take 3 days if it was to be made from oak. But only 24 hours from balsa.

I know the operative word [balsa] is the same in Spanish but am not all convinced the joke will translate. I will try it when I am back next week. Meanwhile, perhaps a Spanish reader could help me with a translation that fits the bill.

Quote of the Day

"Unlike the French red, white and blue tricolour, it works in black and white. It was unusually foresighted of its inventor to make it fully faxable."

A design consultant, commenting on the British flag, which is 400 years old this year.