Trains, Guns and Brides

I went to the doctor's surgery today. To drop off a letter of apology for not turning up for my appointment yesterday. Which I'd convinced myself was tomorrow. Anyway, neither of the receptionists would accept a 'private' letter for onwards transmission. "We're not allowed to accept private letters", I was told. "It's only about my blood pressure and weight", I stressed. "Yes, well, that's considered private." The good news is that when I asked them for a new appointment, they offered me one for this evening. Quite unimaginable in the UK. Where getting one within a week is good news. Three months if you want to see a shrink. I'm told. Anyway, I was as impressed as ever with the specificity of my appointment - 15.48.

For as long as anyone has been alive, the train between Vigo here in South Galicia and Oporto in North Portugal has taken three and a half hours to cover the 93 miles, Or 27 miles per hour. Slower than some snails. From today, though, a new train will do it, without stopping, in only two hours. Or a blistering 46mph. From 2016, it's reported, the journey will only take half an hour. Or 186mph. Either this is a mistake or someone is banking on an AVE high-speed train being in operation by then. Which is barmy. But vamos a ver. It's a very nice thought.

Talking of moving . . . Here's a video you might want to look at before you step into a car in Russia. They say it explains why it's not uncommon for drivers there to install a camera on their dashboards, simply to garner evidence for insurance claims that might otherwise be dismissed as implausible.

And talking of trains . . . I went to Santiago today with my visitors, Anthea and Phil. I dropped them off at the station, while I parked the car, and asked Anthea to get me a new discount card and ticket. As she was doing this, the guy at the desk moaned to his colleague about foreigners being given such inducements such as discounted fares. As he knew Anthea was fluent in Spanish, either he was displaying a degree of xenophobia I've never met before or, more likely in my view, he was displaying the peculiar Galician sense of humour called retranca. I certainly hope so.

The National Rifle Association in the USA has denounced the Catholic Church. I knew if I waited long enough I'd discover something good about it. Anyway, here's the entire list of all the NRA's enemies. Complete with the addresses of various people, so you can go there and shoot out their windows.

In the UK back in April, I had to buy a stapler, despite have 3 back in Spain. I mention this only because it's been an unalloyed joy to use a stapler (from Q-Connect, by the way) that works every time. At least until it has the nerve to run out of staples, that is.

Fellow blogger Lenox has told me of a new Spanish word which is being used by foreign residents where he lives - the hilarious fooding.

Finally . . . I'm a little tired of all the ads for various busty/leggy ladies down the right hand side of my Facebook page. Such as Mujeres ricas buscan amor. [As if!] and Hola! Soy Cindy! So I'm trying an experiment. I've changed my status to Married, to see how automatically these things are done. And whether they're prepared to incur the wrath of my putative wife. Or Putintative wife, as she's come via a Russian mail-order channel. Vamos a ver.