After The War of the EU Trough and The War of the Vigo Whores, we now have The Water Wars. The regions of Castile-La Mancha and Murcia are shaping up to each other over water flows from the river Tajo. And – at a time of severe draught down there – things are getting serious. The government of Castile-La Mancha has produced aerial photos which allegedly show Murcia is storing more water than they’ve admitted to. What next – a Cruise missile into the illegal reservoirs?

Spain is again complaining to Brussels about activities in Gibraltar; this time because people there are allowed to vote in EU elections even though [unlike, of course, people in Ceuta and Melilla] they are mere ‘colonists’. As someone has noted, Spain may well have a good case on this but it would be nice if they could come to court with ‘clean hands’. As it is, they have a long record of completely ignoring Brussels’ rulings about their practice of arbitrarily closing the border and banning cruise ships from Spanish ports. But, of course, in Spain all rules are for other people.

That famous British yachtswoman – Elizabeth Hurley – will be attending the Volvo Ocean Race in Vigo later this year. Now that I’ve mentioned her name, I suppose this blog will be hit in eternity by low life looking for NUDE PICTURES OF LIZ HURLEY. Ah well, it takes all sorts.

Believe it or believe it not, there are actually some wonderful Spanish people who enjoy reading this blog, hopefully because my love of Spain shines through. For their sake, I’ve been asked by Fernando to explain what a ‘fly-tipper’ is. Well, it’s someone who throws rubbish where they shouldn’t, usually places of natural beauty. Or, as my dictionary puts it ‘descarga (ilegal) de basura, etc.’. I have no idea what ‘etc.’ means in this context. Perhaps your adulterous wife’s body, for example. Or Don Manuel Fraga, now that there’s no use for him.

Must go now as I have to look after 20 female American teenagers tonight. It’s a tough job but, as they say, someone has to do it.